Hey guys...yeah, I'm not dead, I swear! XP
I just didn't want to keep filling up the blog with negative and whiney blog posts. Complaining about the costs of wedding dresses, costs of weddings, mostly costs of things XD
But the truth is...
I really hated wedding planning for a while.
*GASP!!!* Me?! Hate wedding planning?! How could this be?!????
Apparently it's different once you really start planning. A LOT different.
Here, I have the freedom to do whatever my little wedding-obsessed heart desires, because it's all speculation and in good fun <3
But now I need to factor in what my mom thinks, what my grandmother thinks, obviously what my groom thinks XD, what will my guests like or be able to stand...etc.
And when you have strong personalities in your life...it can get really frustrating really fast. For a while the wedding just made me super depressed and crazy stressed out. Eloping options were researched XD
And I know I posted last month saying pretty much the same thing, and that I was fine...but oh boy! What a freaking emotional roller coaster these past couple months have been.
Inside my cray-cray brain, as I get closer to the lovely time-of-month were PMS takes over:
I think I'm okay with spending this much money...it is a wedding after all...
Finance: "You know we could really use the money to do some renovations on the house..."
Oh God, this is so wasteful, what am I doing?!
(a few days later...)
Well-Meaning Friend: "You will regret not having a wedding later on in life, go for it!"
Well, if we don't go overboard with wedding extras, it could be doable...you really think so?
(more days pass...)
Well, if we decide to spend the money on a wedding, which venue should I choose?
Grandma: "Have a list of pros and cons, that always helps me."
*makes list, and in my opinion everything evens out*
Which one do I choose?!? o.0
(many days of pondering go by...)
All I need to do is pick a venue and then I'll be set...
(the phone rings)
Well-Meaning Friend: "Omg, you should just elope, you're going to want the money later on!"
OMG WHAT AM I DOING?! HOW AM I EVER GOING TO GET ANY SAVINGS?! I AM SUCH A FINANCIAL FAILURE! XP
So instead of this blog turning into "Sarah's Proof of Emotional Instability", I decided to wait until I felt better about the whole thing XD
The whole thing was just really unexpected for me, even though I've seen the proof plastered on every wedding blog in existence, some things you still need to learn firsthand.
So I think I'm better. I figured out what I wanted, (mostly anyways), and feel like I'm in control again.
All brides with me now, *deep breath*
<3
Showing posts with label wedding roadblocks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label wedding roadblocks. Show all posts
September 4, 2012
The Problems of the Budget Bride
Okay, so I've been absent for quite some time. Why? Well let's just say my bridal thoughts have been less than rosy :P I didn't want to be a Debbie Downer, so I figured it would be better to wait until calmer thoughts came around.
And you know what I realized? That all brides put themselves through torture! If we're not trying to create the most beautiful wedding, we're trying to have the most unique wedding, or trying to make everyone happy.
But even the budget brides may have a problem--we're trying too hard to save money. We're trying to be those clever brides out there who find the diamond-in-the-rough, that seemingly perfect gem that doesn't break the bank, yet forfills all our wedding needs.
Well...what if the venues you find that are affordable are horribly complicated? Sure, you find a pretty empty rental space for cheap, and you find an affordable caterer. But then who's coordinating the vendors, buying the booze, hiring the bartenders, renting the tables/chairs/plates/silverware/etc, setting up the space? Yeah, that falls on you unless you find that diamond-in-the-rough wedding planner for cheap too :P
So you find close to what you're looking for, a venue that covers the basics, has an in-house coordinator, is different and beautiful, can have a ceremony and reception onsite, has great food...wait? It costs HOW MUCH?!? *faints on floor*
So then, we either leave the fabulous venues behind, because we are too stubborn to pay the piper, or, if you're like me, you beat yourself up for spending that much money.
What are we doing?! This is supposed to be enjoyable, not a road of disapointment!
What every bride who scans the bridal blogosphere needs to realize is ALL weddings are inspiration, but just that.
Just like the bride who has the 6-tier cake, the bride who snags the $1500 caterer for 150 is just as unreachable for most of us.
Am I saying that the budget bridal stories are just as damaging as the expensive bridal stories? No.
But they both can give a bride unrealistic expectations, and that's what's dangerous here.
Because even though we want the prices of the wise budget brides, some of us may also want an evening wedding on a Saturday in May or October with a sit-down dinner and booze flowing freely. :P (Oh how my bridal vision keeps changing...more on that later...)
Yeah, I'm pretty much going against every budget reception tip in the book here. And I need to accept that that brings the price up, and there's not much I do about it if I'm not willing to compromise on certain factors.
Well, I am willing to compromise on some, but my finance? Another story XD No one filled him in on the budget saving reception tips apparently! :P
I envisioned finding that perfect place for the perfect price, and I would post it here on my blog, and fellow brides would cheer! and my mother and mother-in-law would be impressed! and my finance could relax about finances! and all sorts of other delusional stuff like that XD
And when it didn't happen? I beat myself up about it, feeling guilty that I'm putting financial pressures on everyone around me and that I'm not saving enough money myself to single-handedly pay for the whole shindig and save everyone from financial torture. This involved a lot of pouting, complaining, and being cranky and generally awful to be around whenever someone mentioned the wedding XP
Until I finally realized that I was being a whiny bitch and should just suck it up and enjoy picking my pretty venue for heaven's sake!
Why did it take me a month to figure this out? No idea, but better to come late to the party than not at all, huh? XD
*deep breath* "I LIKE planning weddings" *deep breath* "I LIKE planning weddings"...
And you know what I realized? That all brides put themselves through torture! If we're not trying to create the most beautiful wedding, we're trying to have the most unique wedding, or trying to make everyone happy.
But even the budget brides may have a problem--we're trying too hard to save money. We're trying to be those clever brides out there who find the diamond-in-the-rough, that seemingly perfect gem that doesn't break the bank, yet forfills all our wedding needs.
Well...what if the venues you find that are affordable are horribly complicated? Sure, you find a pretty empty rental space for cheap, and you find an affordable caterer. But then who's coordinating the vendors, buying the booze, hiring the bartenders, renting the tables/chairs/plates/silverware/etc, setting up the space? Yeah, that falls on you unless you find that diamond-in-the-rough wedding planner for cheap too :P
So you find close to what you're looking for, a venue that covers the basics, has an in-house coordinator, is different and beautiful, can have a ceremony and reception onsite, has great food...wait? It costs HOW MUCH?!? *faints on floor*
So then, we either leave the fabulous venues behind, because we are too stubborn to pay the piper, or, if you're like me, you beat yourself up for spending that much money.
What are we doing?! This is supposed to be enjoyable, not a road of disapointment!
What every bride who scans the bridal blogosphere needs to realize is ALL weddings are inspiration, but just that.
Just like the bride who has the 6-tier cake, the bride who snags the $1500 caterer for 150 is just as unreachable for most of us.
I have to say Mrs. Earrings had one of my favorite budget weddings, but unfortunately a picnic tea party setting just isn't me
Am I saying that the budget bridal stories are just as damaging as the expensive bridal stories? No.
But they both can give a bride unrealistic expectations, and that's what's dangerous here.
Because even though we want the prices of the wise budget brides, some of us may also want an evening wedding on a Saturday in May or October with a sit-down dinner and booze flowing freely. :P (Oh how my bridal vision keeps changing...more on that later...)
Yeah, I'm pretty much going against every budget reception tip in the book here. And I need to accept that that brings the price up, and there's not much I do about it if I'm not willing to compromise on certain factors.
Well, I am willing to compromise on some, but my finance? Another story XD No one filled him in on the budget saving reception tips apparently! :P
I envisioned finding that perfect place for the perfect price, and I would post it here on my blog, and fellow brides would cheer! and my mother and mother-in-law would be impressed! and my finance could relax about finances! and all sorts of other delusional stuff like that XD
And when it didn't happen? I beat myself up about it, feeling guilty that I'm putting financial pressures on everyone around me and that I'm not saving enough money myself to single-handedly pay for the whole shindig and save everyone from financial torture. This involved a lot of pouting, complaining, and being cranky and generally awful to be around whenever someone mentioned the wedding XP
Until I finally realized that I was being a whiny bitch and should just suck it up and enjoy picking my pretty venue for heaven's sake!
Why did it take me a month to figure this out? No idea, but better to come late to the party than not at all, huh? XD
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